or "If i only knew then what i know now."

I'll start:
Joint-checking accounts
Marriage

Go ahead. Get it off your chest. Maybe you'll help somebody not fuck up like you did?

That libertycaps is a flaming asshole.

Thanks to libertycaps, everybody knows that by now, though.

• Having a pet is more expensive than you think
• If you punch somebody, you might get hurt worse than they do
• Completing college does not guarantee you gainful employment
• Never start the evening off with an Irish Carbomb
• There's nothing sexy about being a "troubled" loser

LOL...Good one!

Very simple: never feed trolls.

Don't let yourself get sucked into a relationship you are not ready for because the individual is your "best friend at the time" and "has health problems."

Don't get married when you're 23
Don't have kids until you own a house

That's the spirit.
Go on. Preach on, preachers !!! :)

Look after your teeth.

Checking all the charts, reading news in the morning, playing more puts, having cash. I still don't think I'll remember half of the things I've learned, write more notes, read more books. My strategy's the best, but I get lazy and stray, need other strategies for when I'm lazy and don't want to do the work.

If you constantly have the shits, reduce the amount of dairy in your diet.
If you are an insomniac, exercise longer and more often.

Unless you enjoy perpetual poverty any college education (in a meaningful field) is worth the effort.

^ Perpetual debt.

Blanket pedagoguery may appeal to most in that it puts chicken on the table and trinkets in the living room, but it is not a Golden ticket to an easy life or anything approaching wisdom (I do, however, respect people that have matriculated).
There be a myriad of ways to cut out a living for yourself in this world.

Ingenuity > Diploma

Don't drink 151 proof liquor on a 5 foot rise at the top of an apartment building while on at least 3 other mood altering drugs. You gonna tumble, son.

Don't do deadlifts. Just don't do them. Nothing is worth the risk of messing up your spine for the rest of your life.

If you just gotta pick your nose in public, at least use a kleenex.

The greatest lesson I have learned the hard way is that it's far worse to break someone else's heart than have your own heart broken <\3

Original LPs can be better sounding than CDs.

That pickpockets in Europe are no joke.

Snow goons are bad news.

Almost all girls named Kim are sluts. It sounds like it can't possibly be true, but it is.

/fixed that for ya

Take a personality test. It will help you understand why you do the stupid shit you do (or don't do.) The Myers-Briggs & Enneagram have been the most enlightening for me thus far.

I'm not feeling Damocles 74 since I've never had my heart broken. Don't remember breaking any either, sounds like being fucked in the head, fear of being alone on Friday night. There's always better right around the corner, with boobs and a butt, and you find you never really liked them to begin with you were just projecting your own values on them.

/romance

That being said my bitch better not break my heart, got her on lockdown, and got another one anyway so go right ahead. how long before you can masturbate in front of your lady, or do another chick while she's in the room watching?

Dickish behavior on the internets is dickish. Not cool or funny.